Even though I have some difficulties and awkwardness my struggles aren’t as bad as this woman with cerebral palsy. She deals with it better than I would. I’m a weak person that gives up easily. Yes, I’m typing one handed on my laptop to blog, but that’s nothing. I’m a lazy son of a bitch who blows things out of whack. I’ll shut up now and post a video of Charisse.
As my current theme I’ll say what I’m listening to. Chiodos’ Devil.
Why doesn’t anyone have any faith in me? I’m seriously willing to give up cutting because of what it does to me, but no one ever listens to what I have to say. It’s irritating, but what can I do about it? I wish at least one person actually listen to what I have to see. Is that asking for too much? That seems to be the case.
Listening to The Re-Arrival by Deadlock
No one trusts me anymore. I want to go back to my sister’s place, but certain people think that I can’t keep myself safe. Fuck them! No one knows what’s going on in my head. The truth is that I want to give up on cutting. Anemia isn’t fun and because of that cutting cab make me feel weak. I don’t enjoy that feeling at all. Can I convince at least one person on how serious I am about putting this all behind me? I doubt it.
It’s safe to say that I don’t matter to anyone, I could drop dead right now and life will go on, I don’t feel 100% right now and I just want to sleep all day. I’m just hoping I get an infection. I need that to take the next step. I don’t know what I have to live for anymore and I doubt I’ll find an answer to that question anytime soon. I’m miserable and tired of everyone. I’m going outside when I finish this and think about what to do next. I have to think of something.
One Day At a Time 